Life, love, Reflection, relationships

Has the field of relationships devolved?

It has long been debated whether or not being or not being, in a relationship is considered part of our human nature, but take a look around and ask yourself what it is you have expected from your partner and if you got what you bargained for.

I touched on this subject with a few friends and we laughed about what we look for in potential partners and what you end up actually getting. We all have a rough idea of what we like and want, and some may even have a specific visual preference. But have you signed up for what you wanted?

it isn’t fair to put everyone in the same box and brandish people based on prior experiences, but has society become a place where it more achievable to get that fantasy relationship than your average, normal guy/girl that fits into your life and offers a life of normal, everyday happiness etc?

I for one have never expected a knight in shining armour to come along and sweep me off my feet. But it seems it is more likely to bag your yourself one of them than to get an honest guy nowadays. The same goes for the opposite sex.

Is it asking so much to be an independent woman, that just expects a man to be honest, straight talking and no game playing? These are surely not classed as huge efforts to expect from the opposite sex, are they?

I am not interested in mind games of any kind. I have my own things in life that I like to do and I think its only fair that the guy does his own things as well. But it seems that these traits are few and far between.

What is classed as too much when ticking boxes on potential dates? Yes there will be people that are influenced by money or lust or other materialistic things, but what about personality?

Am I the only one that doesn’t want a guy to text me every day and be in constant contact? For me, it can get over-bearing, but for some, they might like being hounded every minute of the day. But is that not just a insecure personality that feels that they need to know your every waking move??

Is “normal” the new “unobtainable”?

Does trust exist anymore? Does independence scare you off? Can you handle a secure, confident person that knows what they want? Why do people dance around issues and situations rather than talking about it and sorting it out?

Men and women all over the world ask these questions and those that don’t, are they the ones left in an unhappy relationship or worse, single and alone but in need of comfort and still seeking?

I guess for me, I would like a man that knows what he wants and goes for it. He doesn’t feel the need to monitor my every waking move and allows me the same independence that he has but still enjoys being part of a couple in a committed relationship. This is where trust comes into it as well as their own insecurities if they have any. Saying that, I do not date because so far these qualities that I think are small in comparison to what others might ask for, seem to be seriously lacking in the male sector lately. Going into any new relationship means you need to have the initial aspect of trust and the rest you learn along the way with each other. But are the qualities that I think are part of the attraction I see in a guy, asking too much?

Yes I have a type that I find appealing to my eye, but once you get past that, you have to factor in whether or not they have a nice personality and a nice attitude towards themselves and life.

But is it wrong to know what you want? Do we settle for second best because we are too afraid to speak up for what we want?


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